ism ism ismmmmm

INFOSYSism
You have a 1000 poor cows. You put them on a nice campus, & send them one at a time to the US for milking.

PATNIism
You have 10 cows. You make them work so that they give milk of 100 cows.

WIPROism
GE has a cow. You take 49% of the milk.

DELLism
Intel has a Goat. Samsung has a Camel. Buy milk from both & sell it as Cow's milk.

IBMism
You have old stubborn cows. You sell them as pet dogs to innocent small businessmen.

MICROSOFTism
You have a cow. Force the world to buy milk from you. Spend a million dollars to feed poorer cows.

SUNism
You have a bull. It doesn't give milk. You hate Microsoft.

ORACLEism
You have a cow. You don't know which side to milk, so you sell tools to help milk cows.

SAPism
You don't have a cow You sell milking solutions for cows implemented by milking consultants.

APPLEism
You have a cow. You sell iMilk.

SONYism
You have a cow. You spend $50 mn to develop the world's thinnest milk.

CITIBANKism
Welcome to Citibank. If you have a cow, press 1. If you have a bull, press 2...stay on line if you'd like our customer care to milk it for you.

HPism
You don't know if what you have is a cow. You sell complete milking solutions through authorised resellers only.

GEism
You have a donkey. People think you have a 100-year old cow. If someone finds out, that's his imagination at work.

RELIANCEism
You don't yet have a cow. You sell empty cans to people for Rs. 501, because Dhirubhai wanted everyone to have milk.

TATAism
You have a very old cow. You re-brand it as TATA Indicow.

Crack youtube and google videos.

As we all know that none of the video sharing sites provide a link to download their videos. So we will have to do some tweaking and play around to download the videos. Here are some ways to download any video from the internet , they are based on the common hack (Right-click -> "Save Target As" OR copy the link into your download manager,but change the file extension to .flv)

Method 1:This is the simplest method.Download VDownloader . It will download Google, Youtube and Grinvi videos on your computer in avi or mpeg format (not flv) !This is the best method as it downloads videos in avi or mpeg format which can be played on your Pc(as opposed to other methods which download videos in flv format).

Run Vdownloader.exe and copy the url of the video you want to download. Click on Download button and enjoy.

Method 2: For Firefox Users - Install the VideoDownloader Extension from Mozilla Addons website - It downloads all embedded objects on a webpage including the video clips. This is very easy for beginners.

Method 3: One other easy way is to copy your video URL and paste it on KeepVid Lite. When you click submit, you will be provided with a link to save the video as an FLV file.

Using these tricks you can easily download videos from Youtube or Google Videos or Metacafe.

Now some more questions that arise are:

If you use method 2 or 3 you get your video in FLV format.Here sre some tips to manipulate this format:

How do I play FLV files on my computer - They dont open with windows media player or winamp or itunes or real player ?

You can download free FLV players to watch FLV files locally. A good FLV player has a simple and easy-to-remember name - FLV Player. Another nice alternative is the Riva FLV player .Try them out.

How do I split a large FLV file into smaller playable video clips?

This is the most common question among video enthusiasts - they want to split a large FLV video file into smaller chunks for editing or resharing only the interesting tidbits on the internet. To break an FLV file, get the free FLV Parser - a tiny command-line tool to split FLVs into pieces. Its intended use is to convert a large FLV into a series of shorter FLVs based on a series of millisecond-based timecodes. Using the -s switch will split the audio and video of the outputted files; the audio track will be extracted as a series of MP3 files, and the short FLVs produced will have no audio track at all.

How to convert FLV videos to Windows AVI or Quicktime MOV or 3GP formats ?

The free Simplified Universal Player Encoder & Renderer software from Super can convert FLV files to practically any other video format including MP4, MOV H.264, AVI, ASF or Flash SWF animations. Super video convertor

How do I convert my AVI, MPEG, MOV, 3GP movie clips back to FLV format ?

Say you complete editing your movie in Windows Movie Maker or Avid and now left with an MOV file that you want to convert to FLV. Just get the free Riva FLV encoder and relax. The Riva encoder even lets you select parts of the video that you want to convert to FLV and crop the rest.

I have three small video clips that I download from Google Videos and now want to join them into one single video - How do I merge FLV files ?

There is no free software that lets you join FLV files other than the expensive Macromedia Flash Professional. However, here's a simple trick to join several flv video files - convert individual flv files to avi using Super [as mentioned above], then join the multiple Avi files into a single avi file using free VirtualDub and finally convert this avi back to FLV using Riva FLV encoder.Its done.

How do I watch Youtube Video on my iPod, PSP or Television ?

Again we'll make use of the Super Video Encoder mentioned above. Just convert the FLV file into a corresponding format (like Apple iPod or Sony PSP or MPG) and transfer it to your gadget.

Discuss your problems here.

Do GOD exist??????

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.

As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.


They talked about so many things and various subjects. When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: "I don't believe that God exists."


" Why do you say that?"asked the customer.


"Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist.



Tell me, if God exists,would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine loving a God who would allow all of these things."


The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.


The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop. Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and un-kept.


The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber: "You know what? Barbers do not exist."


" How can you say that?"asked the surprised barber. "I am here, and I am a barber.And I just worked on you!"


"No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside."


"Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is, people do not come to me."


"Exactly !"- affirmed the customer. "That's the point! God, too, DOES exist! What happens, is, people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."